Acknowledged by peers and press alike as one of the premier political satirists in the country, Will Durst has patched together a comedy quilt of a career, weaving together columns, books, radio and television commentaries, acting, voice overs and most especially, stand up comedy, into a hilarious patchwork of outraged and outrageous common sense. His abiding motto is “You can’t make stuff up like this." The New York Times calls him "possibly the best political comic in the country." Fox News agrees "he's a great political satirist," while the Oregonian hails him as a “hilarious stand-up journalist.” This former radio talk host, oyster shucker, and margarine smuggler currently writes a nationally syndicated humor column, and his scribblings have appeared in Esquire, George, the San Francisco Chronicle, National Lampoon, The New York Times and scads of other periodicals.
Stop the presses. Hold the phone. Call the queen. Ring a bell. Do the math. Cut the cheese. Bring the hurt. Mind the gap. Get a clue. Catch a break. Hook me up. Cancel lunch. Aid and abet. Alert the media. Blow the shofar.
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The cause of all this consternation? Evidence has emerged that rich people use their money to access privileges that poor folks can’t afford. I know, right? What next: the Pacific Ocean is moist? Plumbers are expensive? Landlords opposed to rent control? Couch cushions in suburban Midwestern basements soiled with beer stains?
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This isn’t just about being able to travel to exotic destinations at a moment’s notice or having decent health care on call or buying in bulk at Costco. This is the dark underbelly of people who never need to glance at the right side of the menu or steal Kleenex from the hotel room or hold up the grocery store lines sifting through coupons.
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After conducting Operation Varsity Blues, the FBI arrested 33 rich parents accused of trying to buy their kids’ admission to prestigious universities through nefarious means: having ringers take SAT tests in their stead. Claiming students were disabled, and while retaking the test, proctors would slip them answers. Other families pretended students were upper level athletes going so far as to Photoshop heads onto team pictures. Hopefully, not football.
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This was done in lieu of earning a slot to matriculate the old-fashioned way: by bribing schools with hefty financial incentives; the traditional and tax-deductible method that Jared Kushner’s father implemented by donating 2.5 million dollars to Harvard. Of course Jared did learn important lessons such as how to marry into a richer family. Or at least what he thought was a richer family.
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Colleges involved announced internal investigations destined to get to the bottom of things somewhere near the turn of the next century. The scheme unraveled when admissions consultant William Rick Singer, who said he built a “side door” to get into the best colleges, cooperated with the investigation in return for immunity.
Coming to a Theatre near you! Will Durst’s acclaimed tribute to the history, growth, joys, achievements, frustrations, fashions and looming doom of the Baby Boom Generation. Ably assisted by his trusty overhead projector, Durst explores the Boomers’ revolutions, evolutions and still vibrant role in today’s youth-obsessed society, which they invented, for crum’s sake. It’s a celebration of the maturation of the Boomer Nation and as an extra, added, special treat- the Meaning of Life.
Special Note: Due to the graphic nature and startlingly archaic technology, children under the age of 40 will not
be admitted unless accompanied by a guardian or bring a note.
We apologize for any inconvenience.
Acknowledged by peers and press alike as one of the premier political satirists in the country, Will Durst has patched together a comedy quilt of a career, weaving together columns, books, radio and television commentaries, acting, voice overs and most especially, stand up comedy, into a hilarious patchwork of outraged and outrageous common sense. His abiding motto is “You can’t make stuff up like this." The New York Times calls him "possibly the best political comic in the country." Fox News agrees "he's a great political satirist," while the Oregonian hails him as a “hilarious stand-up journalist.” This former radio talk host, oyster shucker, and margarine smuggler currently writes a nationally syndicated humor column, and his scribblings have appeared in Esquire, George, the San Francisco Chronicle, National Lampoon, The New York Times and scads of other periodicals.
Stop the presses. Hold the phone. Call the queen. Ring a bell. Do the math. Cut the cheese. Bring the hurt. Mind the gap. Get a clue. Catch a break. Hook me up. Cancel lunch. Aid and abet. Alert the media. Blow the shofar.
